How to Practice Mindful Swiping to Avoid Dating Fatigue

Chloe MullinerChloe Mulliner
Chloe Mulliner
7 min read
Published in Dating 
Are the dating apps contributing to your sense of dating fatigue? If so, check out our guide for tips on how to practice mindful swiping!

When you’re searching for the love of your life on the dating apps, it’s easy to get caught in a loop of mindlessly swiping from one profile to the next. However, this unengaged, passive attitude toward dating probably isn’t yielding you the kind of results you want. 

If you’re feeling tired and uninspired when it comes to online dating, it might be time to give mindful swiping a try. 

What is mindful swiping? Mindful swiping involves taking a more intentional, positive approach to reviewing dating profiles, which can help you foster a healthier relationship with finding love.

But how exactly do you mindfully swipe? We’re here to help you find out. In our guide to mindful swiping, we address some of the signs of mindless dating and offer ways to incorporate mindful dating practices into your own life. 

Signs of Mindless Dating

If you’re not careful, dating apps can impact your mental health, so it’s essential to recognize the signs of mindless dating. Mindless dating is the opposite of mindful dating, meaning you’re probably feeling aloof and randomly swiping without giving the profiles any deep consideration. 

Do you think you might be entering mindless dating territory? If so, check out some common signs that suggest you may be ready to take a more mindful approach to dating.

Experiencing Dating Fatigue

If you feel disconnected, indifferent, hopeless, or cynical when you even think about opening your dating apps, there’s a good chance you’re experiencing dating fatigue. This can result from hours of mindless swiping, making you feel exhausted at the mere thought of connecting with a person, let alone going on a date. 

Keep in mind that meeting new people and going on dates should be exciting, but if you’re feeling flippant about the whole thing, you may need to consider a more mindful mindset. 

Swiping All Throughout the Day

If you’re swiping while brushing your teeth in the morning, standing in line at the grocery store, waiting for your friend to join you for dinner, and watching a movie on the couch, you are, without a doubt, mindlessly swiping. 

You see, when you swipe any chance you get, you’re not giving it the time or effort it deserves. After all, are you really taking the time to read the text, review photos, and digest the content on each profile? Probably not. 

Forgetting Your Dating Goals

Are you swiping left on profiles you would usually swipe right on because you’re feeling annoyed or defeated at the prospects? Or are you swiping right on people you don’t really fancy because you’re beginning to feel desperate about finding love? If so, you’re pretty much throwing all your dating goals out the window, which is another sign of mindless dating. 

When you turn your back on your preferences or ignore what you truly want, your dating experience can become a messy crapshoot. If that sounds familiar to you, it might be time to take on a more mindful dating mindset. 

Judging Profiles

When you can’t find anything nice to say about the profiles you’re seeing, there’s a good chance you’ve been mindlessly swiping. This negative mindset suggests you’re probably feeling a little deflated and likely experiencing dating fatigue. 

Now, there’s no sense in continuing to swipe if you’re going to criticize and critique profiles that may otherwise be a suitable match for you. In this case, we recommend practicing some mindful swiping.

Ways to Practice Mindful Swiping

Don’t worry if any of the above signs sound familiar. Just because you’ve been trapped in a cycle of mindless dating doesn’t mean you can’t turn things around. To help get you back on track and encourage a healthier mindset, check out some of the following ways to practice mindful dating and swiping. 

Set Aside a Time to Swipe

First things first, no more randomly swiping whenever you have a spare minute. If you really want to take swiping seriously, we recommend setting aside some time you can devote to reviewing profiles. Turn off any distractions and give your undivided attention to your dating apps, reading each profile and reflecting on how it relates to your dating preferences and goals. To avoid dating fatigue and frustration, we suggest starting with short 15 or 20-minute stretches just a few times a week. 

Remember Your Dating Goals

When you date with intention, your dating goals and preferences can be your guiding light. Keep what you want top of mind rather than haphazardly swiping and criticizing profiles. For instance, if your religious beliefs or stance on having children is important to you, search for these details in their profiles to avoid wasting your time on people who don’t align with your preferences. 

When you feel yourself getting willy-nilly with your swipes and swiping right on those who are off-base, call it a day and come back to the dating apps later. 

Keep It Fun 

A big part of accomplishing mindful dating involves coming to the table (or your mobile device) with a positive, upbeat, and hopeful attitude. Remember, dating is supposed to be fun! 

Before sitting down for your daily or weekly swiping session, hype yourself up. For you, that might mean turning on your favorite song and dancing in the kitchen. For someone else, it might include doing a meditation session or journaling to get into a calm and peaceful mindset. 

That said, if you still feel like you’re in a funk, give this round a miss and come back to the apps when you’re in a better mood. 

Practice Self-Care

If you really want to master a healthy, holistic approach to dating, mindfulness is only one piece of the puzzle. The other pieces include practicing self-care, such as loving yourself and being compassionate.

Be sure to take the time to tune into yourself. If you’re feeling a little frazzled, journal your thoughts and feelings. Or, if you’re feeling stressed, draw yourself a bubble bath or go for a gentle walk. When you dedicate time to supporting your mental, emotional, and physical health, you’ll notice a natural, more mindful shift in how you date.

Come from a Place of Kindness 

Kindness goes a long way. Start by practicing kindness with yourself, and then extend it to others. Give yourself props for creating a profile, and pay yourself some compliments. Then, rather than judging the people in the photos you see or thinking something negative about them, try to think of one nice thing to say about them instead. 

The people on these dating apps are vulnerable and putting themselves out there just like you, so it helps to appreciate and celebrate their efforts. When you come from a place of kindness, you just may see a spark in someone you may have otherwise missed. 

Look for other Dating Avenues

One way to practice mindful swiping is to do less of it. Instead of relying solely on the dating apps, look into other dating avenues. For example, check out places to meet people offline, ask your friends if they know any singles, and give matchmatching a whirl. When you’re open to meeting people in different ways, you’ll be more intentional with your swiping when you do decide to swipe through profiles.  

Take a Break if You’re Feeling Overwhelmed

Finding your match isn’t a race. There is no rush. And you don’t need to push through the aches, pains, and fatigue to get to that nonexistent finish line. 

If you notice yourself getting annoyed or angry with the dating apps or profiles you’re swiping through, put your phone down and walk away. That might mean walking away for the day and picking it up again tomorrow or walking away for a week or more. Use that break to recalibrate, like practicing self-love, reflecting on what you want in a partner, and exploring other dating outlets. 

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