“Dating with no intent to marry is like going to the grocery store with no money. You either leave unhappy or take something that isn’t yours.”
(Jefferson Bethke, author of It’s Not What You Think)
Even if getting married isn’t your ultimate goal, you can probably still feel where Bethke is coming from. When you’re dating, there should be some sort of goal in mind, right? Yours might be different from the next person, but still…there needs to be some type of aim or plan.
The very definition of the word “casual” should be our first clue. It means “without definite or serious intention; careless or offhand; passing.”
Who wants to be treated like that? Who wants to spend a significant amount of time with a person if it’s not clear what the intentions are? Who wants to be treated as a passing stopover?
The article “The Hook-Up Culture: How an Entire Generation Forgot How to Actually Date Someone,” surfaces a valid point:
“In light of people’s hectic lives, we tend to favor the quicker, easier options, especially when it comes to dating. However, typically the easier option doesn’t end up being the most satisfying option. Love interests simply turn into a flings or even just another one-night stand.”
OK, so casual dating might seem easier, but rarely is it truly satisfying. Check out the 5 Ways to Avoid the Cliff of Contemporary Dating, which outlines the road blockers daters should dodge to evade the now seemingly sanctioned norm of casual dating. Because (as we frequently point out) you decide the course of your dating life.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
Valerie, Heartalytics Editor