It was just a few weeks ago that we were all bombarded with commercials and social media posts of families and couples enjoying the holidays together – sorry, I’m guilty of slipping a few out there too! And here we are again. Valentine’s Day is on the horizon and naturally, love is in the air. But what about those without a significant other…the single ladies and gents out there?! The pressure to find someone to exchange a box of chocolates over a romantic dinner date is extremely real.
Whether on TV, in magazines, or by social media, ads sell much more than products and services. These messages promote social scripts. They provide value archetypes that we “should” adopt as contributing members of society related to love, success, happiness, family, beauty, masculinity and femininity. Unfortunately, these external standards do not often reflect our true nature, our intelligence, talents, strength, character, our real desires – our authenticity!
When we buy into social scripts and dismiss who we truly are, knowingly or unknowingly, our self-concept is negatively impacted.
To develop healthy perception of self and erase any distress you might feel about your relationship status (or any other area of life you’re not madly in love with), it’s important to cultivate positive experiences. These positive experiences must mirror what YOU are truly looking for – and please note, it’s an inside job! That’s right, your success in romance, your career or anything else, starts with you defining it for yourself!
The most important relationship you can have is with yourself. The standards you set for yourself (or not), the commitments you make with yourself and keep (or not), ultimately inform if you view yourself as a priority (or not). If standards are set and met, and commitments are made (and kept), you are cultivating a positive relationship with yourself. Learning to love yourself first will help you to find love in all of the [other] right places – romantically, professionally, etc.
For myself, I’ve identified 3 ways to improve self-perception so that I can begin attracting the people, opportunities and experiences that I want most. I will share these strategies on next week’s article, Love Connection: 3 Ways to Love Yourself Better.
What rewarding commitments can you make with yourself (and keep) this week?
Make 3 individual commitments and keep them. Here a few ideas to jumpstart this challenge. This upcoming week…
- I will hit the gym 3 nights after work.
- I will take myself out to dinner at my favorite neighborhood restaurant.
- I will cut out soda and other sugary drinks that do not nourish my body or mind.
- I will bite the bullet and complete the project that’s been left unfinished (i.e. 2016 taxes, reorganizing the closet, cleaning out the garage).
- I will stop the hustle long enough to enjoy some personal ritual “me” time: take a bubble bath and light that fancy candle just because!
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Matchmaker + Executive Coach
The Tawk to Me launch is just around the corner! Join me for thought-provoking conversations with leading influencers. We will boldly share the realities of today’s single life, dating game, marriage mayhem and more on the relationships that mean the most to us!
Tawk To Me is a monthly, digital interview series that will kick off Valentine’s Day with mentor, entrepreneur and TV Host, Paul C. Brunson. Get The Scoop and be sure to check back Feb. 14th!