Finding your person isn’t always easy. You might be spending all your free time editing your profile and swiping left and right, but no matter how hard you try, you’re not having any luck on the dating apps. And that can be discouraging.
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. In fact, various surveys of online daters suggest dating app burnout is real—and on the rise. But what exactly is dating app burnout? And are there alternatives to dating apps?
In our guide below, we dive into what dating app burnout is and why it might be happening and address some ways you can find love without dating apps. Follow along to find out more!
Dating app burnout is a word used to describe when online daters feel overwhelmed or discouraged by the dating apps. This dating fatigue describes when you’re tired of dating apps, feeling unmotivated, frustrated, bored, or even sad at the thought of online dating. If you’re experiencing burnout, you might find yourself mindlessly swiping, avoiding logging into your messages, and dreading the prospect of going on a date.
Dating burnout and fatigue are real experiences, and if you’re not careful, these dating apps can negatively impact your mental health.
There are a lot of reasons why you might be tired of dating apps. For example, some online daters receive mean comments or unwanted sexually explicit images that can destroy their self-esteem, while others feel like their egos are damaged when they don’t match with others.
Furthermore, it’s not uncommon to face catfishing, ghosting, and flash panning on these apps. Between the online daters who aren’t using photos that accurately represent themselves and those who ignore you after the first date, being on the dating apps can be a disheartening and frustrating experience. You’re also facing algorithm nightmares, not to mention bots, spam, and fake accounts.
Even if you have an unwavering sense of self-confidence and high hopes for finding love on the apps, the phony profiles are enough to make you bang your head against a wall. And all that can do a number on your self-esteem. After all, it only takes so many letdowns to make you wonder if you’re the problem. But let us be clear: it’s not you; it really is them.
Whether you’re tired of getting mistreated on the apps or sick of swiping at no avail, it might be time to look into some alternatives to dating apps.
Dating apps aren’t the end-all-be-all. There are actually countless other ways to continue your dating journey without logging into the apps. From hiring a matchmaker service to joining single meet-ups, check out these alternatives to dating apps.
Tired of the dating apps? Then, turn to your friends, family members, neighbors, and even coworkers. Let them know you’re single and ready to mingle. After all, these folks know you best, and they might know someone who could be compatible with you. For instance, your sister’s best friend’s cousin might share your passion for community service, or your coworker’s college buddy is the only one in the world who could possibly match your trivia skills.
When you tell your loved ones you’re open to being set up, you just might be surprised that their recommendations are the perfect match for you!
Just as your loved ones may have dating recommendations for you, they may also have a whole pool of friends and relatives you’ve never even met! But the only way you’ll meet them is by putting yourself out there.
So, for this dating app alternative, RSVP “yes” to invitations and attend your friends’, relatives’, and coworkers’ gatherings. Go stag to your aunt’s wedding, make an appearance at your neighbor’s birthday bash, and venture out on that pub crawl with your cousin. You never know who you’ll meet along the way!
If you’re committed to finding love without dating apps, then why not give a matchmaking service a try? These services were designed for those who are dating with intention and are serious about finding a partner.
Professional matchmaking services like Tawkify begin by learning who you are and what kind of partner you want. Instead of filling out an impersonal questionnaire, you’ll meet with a professional who will ask questions, listen to your answers, and create a roadmap based on your in-depth conversations and feedback. Using that information, the matchmaker leverages advanced AI technology to identify capability patterns and narrow down suitable candidates that they then personally vet. They will arrange an introduction only after they confirm that the potential matches are compatible with you.
There are many benefits of hiring a matchmaker, but perhaps the most important one is that they create a dating experience tailored specifically to you. This provides you with a customized dating experience that actually yields results that align with your preferences.
You’re not the only one recognizing dating app burnout—even the dating app providers are taking note. To help, many of these dating app platforms have begun hosting in-person dating events to encourage people to interact in real life outside of their platforms. For instance, Bumble has a new series called Bumble IRL that promotes single meet-ups like spin classes and community service activities, while Match has hosted in-person mixers called 72 Hours.
According to the event ticketing platform Eventbrite, game-based dating events soared 163% in 2023, with athletic dating events following suit with a 135% increase. So, if you’re looking for alternatives to dating apps, check your community calendar for local single meet-ups and mixers in your area, and don’t be afraid to see what’s out there.
Speeding dating? Don’t knock it until you try it! Believe it or not, speed dating is making a comeback. Between 2021 and 2022 alone, Eventbrite saw a 75% increase in speed-dating gatherings, as singles, especially the younger generation, are looking for an alternative to the dating apps.
There are all kinds of speed-dating formats for different sexual orientations, ages, interests, and dating preferences that are designed to take the pressure off dating and make it a more laid-back and fun experience. Interested in giving it a whirl? Invite your BFF along and race the clock together to find love—and maybe even friendship.
Taking part in your favorite activities is another alternative to dating apps. This is an organic way of dating because when you do the things you enjoy, you’re more likely to connect with others who enjoy those activities, too.
For example, if you’re an art enthusiast, sign up for oil painting classes, or if you love to play on the court, join your local basketball league. From cooking classes and pick-up soccer games to academic courses and book clubs, there are so many ways to meet potential matches when you engage in your favorite hobbies.
If you want to find love outside of dating apps, sometimes, you can take a more passive approach than an active approach to dating. By this, we mean simply putting your phone down and engaging with your surroundings. Instead of swiping away on your hour train ride to work, look around. Maybe the attractive guy next to you is reading the same book as you, or that cute girl three seats down keeps making eye contact with you. Or what about the chatty barista who always remembers your name? Or that guy in your yoga class who always strikes up a conversation with you?
You see when you’re open to meeting someone offline and making connections in real life, you might find some potential matches right under your nose!
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