Finding a romantic partner who is the perfect match for you isn’t always an easy feat. After all, there are so many things you need to keep in mind and consider, on top of determining if you even like or love that person in the first place!
Because it can sometimes feel overwhelming, we’re here to help. Whether you’re assessing if your current partner might be the one or searching for someone who would make a good mate, we’ve gathered the top qualities to look for in a partner.
From making sure you’re with someone who respects you to determining if you share similar relationship values, this list of qualities and traits can help you decide what to look for in a relationship. Follow our advice below to see if your partner (or future partner) hits the mark.
Honesty
Trust and honesty are biggies when you’re wondering what to look for in a relationship. Do you and your partner mutually trust each other? Or are you always catching each other in a lie or sneaking around behind each other’s backs?
You see, without trust, you both may start forming insecurities, as you constantly question each other’s motives or wonder if they’re lying about where they are or what they’re doing. This can spiral out of control, causing you to doubt one another and experience undue stress and worry.
If you want to build a strong and healthy relationship, you need to be honest with one another from the very beginning. Find someone who is forthcoming and transparent and doesn’t make you question their every move.
Respect
Respect is another one of the top qualities to look for in a partner. This means your partner will accept all of you, from your own qualities and characteristics down to your accomplishments and achievements.
When your partner is respectful, it also means they respect other parts of your life, such as your friendships with others and your need to spend time alone. If your partner listens to you, values your opinions, and supports your aspirations, then these are all signs of someone who respects you—and a green flag in your relationship.
Supportive
Your relationship won’t always be smooth sailing, so it’s essential to find someone who is supportive of you during your highs—and your lows. You want a partner who will encourage your aspirational endeavors and cheer you on but who will also give you a hug when you fail and help you rebuild when things fall apart.
Reflect on the way your partner supports you. Do they make you feel like the soft landing gear that will gently catch your fall? Or do they feel like the reason you need that emergency gear in the first place?
Reliability
If you want to go the distance with your partner, then you need to know you can rely on them for both the little things and the big things in life. This means you can count on them to show up, both physically and emotionally, when you need them most. It also involves them being true to their word. Look for someone who is there for you, whether you need a ride to the airport or a shoulder to cry on.
Kindness
Kindness is one of the best qualities to look for in a partner. But instead of only analyzing how they treat you, look at how they treat other people in their lives, from their mother down to the waiter at a restaurant. Are they understanding and respectful? Or are they impatient and demanding with them? If your partner is kind, then they’ll treat everyone they encounter with a gentle demeanor and open heart.
Shared Chemistry
When it comes to your relationship, there needs to be some kind of spark between you and your partner. This spark or chemistry is what sets a romantic partner apart from a friend. Do you feel a connection? A sense of romance? Or a desire to be intimate?
Empathy
Empathy is another crucial quality when it comes to your romantic partner. After all, it is empathy that gives someone the ability to understand and convey feelings. You should look for a partner that is capable of interpreting your thoughts, feelings, and emotions and making sense of them. If your partner has empathy, then they can sympathize with you and try to understand what you’re going through, even if they don’t feel it for themselves. This trait will help your relationship in all sorts of situations, from the small differences in your opinions to the larger disagreements.
Independence
Search for someone who is independent and willing to be on their own sometimes. This might mean your partner makes alone time a priority, tries out new solo hobbies, and encourages you to spend time with your friends and family. A little space and distance is healthy in a relationship, as it gives you the room to thrive and grow individually and as a couple.
Shared Values
It’s important to first identify your own pillars of purpose. These are the core values that you live by and that guide your decisions in each area of your life. What’s important to you? What beliefs do you follow? And what political or religious views shape your opinions?
When connecting with a potential romantic partner, having tactical knowledge of these core values will help you assess compatibility. Think about what relationship values are most important to you and look out for someone whose own values align with yours.
Communication
This is a key ingredient to establishing and maintaining a successful relationship. Both parties should be open to sharing their desires and frustrations — and work (kindly) toward solutions when disagreements arise. The regular application of transparent honesty and open communication ensures you’re always functioning as a team.
Sense of Humor
If it’s one thing you need to get through life, it’s a sense of humor. And the same goes for your relationship. That’s why finding someone who can laugh off the small things or find the hilariousness in an outrageous situation is an important factor in a healthy relationship. There’s no reason to be serious all the time, so look for a romantic partner who can crack a joke to lighten the mood.